Bed Bath and Beyond had a sale on French Bath Soaps.  I was thinking... since when did the French start bathing? --Joel Brill

When you get stopped by the cops keep your mouth shut. I got stopped for suspicion of driving drunk. The cop drew a line in the dirt and said walk this line heel to toe, heel to toe. I said, "That’s not fair because I can’t even do that when I’m sober." --Joel Brill


One of the challenges of getting older is that words and expressions take on different meanings.  Like, friends with benefits.  To me a friend with benefits is a friend with Social Security and Medicare.

The Lovable Curmudgeon

I have a friend who lives in Whales.  His name is Jonah.

Joel Brill

If you tell someone my age you are having an affair, they will usually ask if you are having it catered.

I'm against same sex marriage.  My wife and I have had the same sex for 40 long years.