The Lovable Curmudgeon

The 99 Cent store went public at $21 per share. So much for brand integrity

My 90 year old mother dates a lot of different guys. I asked, where do you meet all of these guys?

Mom said, There's a web site for people my age, carbondating.com..

 To me, making people laugh is like the

Hokey Pokey...

That's what it's all about!


Same sex marriage? I'm not a fan.  My wife and I have had the same sex for 40 long years.

One of the challenges of getting older is that words and expressions take on different meanings.  Like, friends with benefits.  To me that's a friend with Social Security and Medicare.

Joel Brill

I  developed an aversion to alcohol at a young age. I spent 9 months totally consumed in vodka…then my mother gave birth to me!

My doctor told me to lower my sodium intake.  I take his advice with a greain of salt.  Do you know how hard it is to make a Margarita with Mrs. Dash?

Comedian